—I watched the Home Run Derby. I enjoyed it. Bryce Harper won it in front of his home fans in D.C. But obviously, OBVIOUSLY, there were people who jumped on Twitter to complain about the way Harper won it. Apparently, according to these idiots, Harper cheated his way to a Home Run Derby championship. The rules state that you’re supposed to let the ball land before another pitch is thrown. Harper’s Dad was pitching to him. And these social media assassins are saying that Harper’s Dad threw a few pitches before previously hit home runs reached the stands.
The people complaining about this are the same people who are ruining the world. Some of you want to blame President Trump for that (and no, this is not a political opinion, so shut up), but I blame the miserable fools who found it worth their while to care about this Home Run Derby rule enough that they would decide to tweet about it. Why would you even care? Honestly. It’s the Home Run Derby. And it was an exciting one with plenty of drama until the very end, when Harper basically won it in walk-off fashion. If you watched that and then decided to dig into the rule book, you need to seek help, asap.
And if you then decided to tweet about it, the Twitter purge should start with you.
—Manny Machado is getting traded. As I write this, that’s pretty much all we know. Some reports say he’s going to the Los Angeles Dodgers for prospects. Those reports are probably true. By the time you read this, you’ll probably know where Machado is heading. And even though all reports indicate it will be LA, it’ll only be a rental, as Machado will be a free agent this winter.
That’s when I expect the New York Yankees to go all in on signing him, which is why they’ve probably decided to let the Dodgers give up the prospects for him now, while the Yankees can just write him a check in the winter.
—The British Open is this weekend. By the way, when did they stop calling it that? Everywhere I look, it’s now called The Open Championship. That’s fine and all, but can I not call it The British Open anymore? I’m genuinely confused. Anyways, you should put in a DraftKings lineup for The British Open. Sign up right now at DraftKings.com and use promo code “PIC” to play for free with your first deposit. You can choose any sport. But for golf, all you do is pick six golfers. And this weekend, if you miss the cut to pick six golfers before they tee off on Thursday, you can pick six more for DraftKings’ “Weekend Golf” contest for Rounds 3 and 4. Download the DraftKings app right now to find out what I’m talking about. And again, use promo code “PIC” to play for free.
—The Pro Football Hall of Fame enshrinement for the Class of 2018 is in a few weeks, and Terrell Owens will choose not to show up. Not that we didn’t already know he was a clown — we did — but choosing not to show up to Canton is worse than any terrible touchdown celebration he had back in the day. However, there was some news on Owens this week that might explain his absence from the Hall of Fame induction ceremony. According to his agent, Owens wants to play in the NFL again. Right.
The guy is 44 years old, and he has’t played in an NFL game since 2010. Owens’ agent also said that if no NFL team wants him, then he’ll play in the CFL, calling it “the next-best option.”
Owens says he’s never stopped training like he was an NFL player. So how does he explain his absence from the league since 2010 with the Cincinnati Bengals? If nobody wanted him in 2014, what makes him think a team is going to take a chance on him in 2018? And again, the guy is 44 years old. Don’t even give me the “Patriots should take a flyer on him.” They shouldn’t. They won’t. So let’s not make that a thing on TV and radio. If Owens had any family or friends who actually cared about him, they’d tell him to give up the dream and show up in Canton to give his speech, like everybody else. And if he was smart, he’d listen to them. Have fun in the CFL, buddy.